I always found conversation difficult. Two reasons : I can’t maintain a pretend level of interest for longer than one second. I can’t break my habit of telling the truth, which seems to be social suicide. I needed to find a way round this. I needed a plan for when dialogue fails. If I didn’t […]
‘If the mountain will not come to Muhammad, then Muhammad must go to the mountain’ arises from the story of Muhammad, as retold by Francis Bacon, in Essays, 1625: I try my best to minimize problems in my own life. As most people are making mountains out of molehills, I very much turn mountains into […]
Some of you will remember my hatred of flies. How I invented one sided Windows to take advantage of that – flies could not fly in but could fly out. One sided Windows post. Note to Sales staff : Sales are going quite well. Well done. However, I think we have an additional opportunity. Not […]
I’ve always hated flies. Once they’re in your house it so hard to get rid. Depending on the type of windows you have. The top opening ones are the worst. The flies get in but there is no way for them to get out again. Side opening windows are much better but it never solved […]
Have you seen my friend? I took his photo after insulting his mother. As friends do, I thought about the photo I had and wondered – How could I use this to aggravate him even more? Perfecto It seems someone had already travelled back in time and created a product using his face – spandex […]
Our village was central to the supply for villages across the country. New people would come in, or existing inhabitants would eventually breed new stock. Then it was just waiting for another village to give one of us a call. “Hi, Are you an idiot ? “ I’ll never forget where I was the day […]
There are two possibilities. The Bull is browsing for China. The Bull owns the shop. I didn’t know the bull owned the shop when I walked in. My lucky day. Bulls are hopeless with money. He’d priced it all wrong. After the glass disaster and the cup purchase in my other post, I was […]
It is impossible to have a drink in a glass without an argument. Without some fool making a comment. I even had to draw the blinds,people were peering through the windows. Trying to see how much was in it. Telling me there’s a reason why . I just could not handle the scrutiny. I told […]
Don’t open a lemonade shop like my father did.
Everybody’s getting lemons all the time. For free.
What was he thinking?
People are so damned positive these days,lemonade is everywhere .
You know what happened?
My father filled his van with his useless lemons and drove off a cliff.
Here’s a photo of him relaxing in happier times :
Your damned positivity killed my father.
So when life gives you lemons think about that.