Big Boy
At 3 years old I remember running into the other room to show everyone my new word
“****” I said. “****”
I was so pleased at myself. I was a big boy. I knew loads of words.
I went everywhere saying “****”
Anywhere I went inside and outside the house “****”
They couldn’t stop me saying “****”
Even writing this I am tempted to say “****”
Grandmother Saves the day
My Grandmother took me to one side.
She was telling me a secret. I felt special.
I knew an even better word.
I ran into the next room, shouting :
“Sausages.”
I was a big boy.
Are you blonkers?
What’s your favorite vegetable replacement for a swear word?
Can I recommend “kumquat the fig off?”
Lol I LOVE thus. Bet most of us can relate!
LikeLiked by 2 people
S*****e
LikeLike
Cabbage! 🐢
LikeLike
Kindly get your cabbage outta ma face 😏
LikeLiked by 1 person
you seem to be swearing at yourself
LikeLiked by 1 person
Cabbage.
LikeLike
Great way to start the day – reading a post that made me laugh out loud. Have a great day, Tim!
LikeLiked by 1 person
hello someone 🙂
LikeLike
“Melon-flower”
LikeLiked by 1 person
Mangelwurzels, or the non veggy soggy muffins!
There’s a joke there about Muffin the Mule.
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂 yes ! – I’ve got a brand new combine harvester – Wurzels vegetable tribute or something out of the two ronnies – where one got caught by the mangelwurzels 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oooh Ron! Yes Eth?
LikeLike
Vegetable curse words? I see a whole new t shirt business in your future…
Kiss my asparagus!
Persimmon this!
Okra you!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Smart grandma!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
lol, I like to think she was. She told me a few years later
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wise grandmother!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I can imagine the looks on people’s faces. Lol Nothing like grandmothers to save the day.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well I’ve grown up now, but still like to use vegetables instead of swear words
LikeLiked by 2 people
I do wonder if we’re going to have to invent some new types of swearing.
In a time where the eff word is used as punctuation or a prefix,
The shock, drama, aggression and emphasis is being lost from over use.
Cussing like a dock yard welder in the work place appears acceptable.
I can remember a time when it wasn’t.
The eff word is adaptable and has a wide range of meanings,
“It’s f**ked” for example, means something is beyond repair or doomed without long winded technical explanations.
LikeLiked by 1 person
we’ve run out of body parts and activities that can be seen as unacceptable, so perhaps moving on to vegetable will work..
LikeLike