Not having cake and eating cake.

They say, “You can’t have your cake and eat it”

First of all, who are ‘they’?

There’s a secret gang of officials somewhere making up all of these well known phrases that just aren’t accurate known only as ‘they’

Not being able to have or own cake and eat it too just poses a real problem.

People will stop buying cake. I’ve yet to meet anyone who only buys or makes cake for the sole purpose of looking at them.

Manufacturers will be over-run with useless,unusable cake.

Cake food mountains will follow.

Even if cake was distributed to those less fortunate, it still can’t be eaten.

You can’t have your cake and eat it.

How is the problem of cake mountain to be solved?

Some sort of government intervention and think tank will be needed to come up with ideas on how to get rid of the excess.

  1. Perhaps re-purpose a percentage of Victoria Sponge as medically approved lumbar support and municipal play area surfacing.
  2. Ask dentists to use Cadbury’s Mini Rolls as the medical packing swabs during procedures.

3. Battenburgs as an alternative to kerb stones, garden furnishings and block pavers for the modern driveway.

4. Perhaps see an end to the current social housing crisis with a mass of cake-condos?

No. Wait, that’s already been tried. It didn’t end well for Hansel and Gretel – but in all fairness that was before the 1989 Childrens’ Act.

5. Perhaps the committee could persuade folk to use cake as an alternative to furniture and decorative ornaments for the home and business? I can see Ikea rammed to the rafters with flat pack stollen.

Or how about,

Give your cake to someone else and then eat it off their plate?

If you don’t own the cake then according to ‘they’ you can eat it.

Simple.

Cancel the committee, have a piece of cake.

Problem solved.



Tim Willow’s Additional Thoughts

This is a guest post by Grace Nomel, who posts on Thursdays.

I am still not confident to know whether I can eat cake or not.

Grace is an honorary member of my old village.

17 thoughts on “Not having cake and eating cake.

  1. The problem lies with the ownership of the cake (to have)
    You’re offered cake, you take a piece, the cake belongs to you.
    You ‘have’ cake.

    Solution:
    Pass your cake to another person – (within striking distance – important)

    You no longer ‘have’ cake –
    This leaves you free to lean across and enjoy eating cake while they’re still holding it.
    (Is why striking distance is important factor)

    Like

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